


aftersome

by sstxrlight



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Gen, Hallucinations, How Do I Tag, I Tried, Langst, M/M, Post-Canon, Post-Season/Series 08, Psychotropic Drugs, References to Drugs, implied klance, implied mutual pining, klangst, no beta we die like men
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-09
Updated: 2021-03-09
Packaged: 2021-03-15 09:55:13
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,015
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29931684
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sstxrlight/pseuds/sstxrlight
Summary: [aftersome:adj. astonished to think back on the bizarre sequence of accidents that brought you to where you are today — as if you’d spent years bouncing down a Plinko pegboard, passing through a million harmless decision points, any one of which might’ve changed everything — which makes your long and winding path feel fated from the start, yet so unlikely as to be virtually impossible.]Lance is the only paladin who stays on Earth after the end of the war. Away from his friends, with years of untreated trauma and unable to overcome Allura's death, he gradually loses his grip on reality. And when Keith comes back for a visit, he didn't expect to find Lance admitted to a psychiatric clinic with a severe case of hallucination.
Relationships: Keith & Lance (Voltron), Keith/Lance (Voltron)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 69





	aftersome

**Author's Note:**

  * For [SuriSatriz](https://archiveofourown.org/users/SuriSatriz/gifts).



> I wrote this fic in the middle of a writing block thanks to a tweet from a friend of mine, you can read it [here](https://twitter.com/adparrsh/status/1357785199975804931?s=19m)
> 
> also, english is not my first language, so you can read the portuguese version of this fic [here](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29931438)

The first time Keith entered that room, he was struck by a feeling of nostalgia. All the empty space just waiting to be filled, the gray walls and the artificial lights, it was almost as if he was entering his room at the Castle of Lions again. It was a familiar but twisted feeling. Everything was similar enough to bring memories back to his mind, but strange enough that several alarms of imminent danger were going off in his head, keeping him alert. His instincts automatically searched for something tangible to give him a sense of security, drawing his attention to a familiar pair of blue eyes.

Familiar, but _twisted._

Even weeks later, he couldn't help but be on alert every time he passed that doorway. He always had a hard time fighting his instincts, especially one as strong as this one. The room was no longer as empty as it had been that first time: now some flowers with cards, framed photos and a plate of cookies covered the desk. Gifts from other visitors. If Keith tried to guess, he would probably say that Hunk made the cookies, but he wasn't very interested in knowing who brought the rest.

“Keith, you're back!” hearing Lance’s voice was a little unsettling. It was loaded with enthusiasm that didn’t show on his face and weirdly controlled. Quiet. It was no longer the same voice that used to fill the castle corridors, or the one Keith was used to hearing inside his helmet during battles.

“Hi, Lance,” he replied, forcing a smile and sitting on the wooden chair next to the bed. Lance smiled back, but it didn't reach his eyes, which seemed a little out of focus and lost, a faded blue in an ocean of gray.

One of the nurses had warned him that Lance had taken his medication not long ago and the effect was going to last a few hours. As much as he hated seeing Lance like that, nothing was worse than the time he visited when they had to stop the medication. The sound of the brunet's sobs haunted Keith's nightmares for days.

_“Everything hurts so much, Keith,”_ Lance had said, hands shaking where they held his shirt tightly, clinging to Keith as if he were at the edge of a cliff. _“I can't take it anymore, I... please help me, I-... I don't know what to do.”_

“How are you feeling?” Keith asked carefully, the memory of that day permanently burned in his brain.

“I'm not feeling much of anything, really,” Lance shrugged, that lazy smile still tattooed on his face. “It's kinda funny, it feels like I'm super high. I even asked one of the nurses if smoking was allowed here. She said no. I probably should have guessed that.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he snorted, crossing his arms, and leaning against the chair.

“Of course _you_ would say that.” Lance emphasized and Keith had to fight the small smile threatening to appear on his face. Some things never change. “You must be the world’s most boring stoner, super moody and grumpy and all that.”

Lance crossed his arms and made the most exaggerated irritated face he could manage, casting an accusing glance at the other boy. Keith raised an eyebrow and Lance pointed a finger at him: “That’s you, by the way.”

“And _you_ are… ridiculous,” he said, receiving an offended whimper from Lance in response.

They stayed like this for a while, and Keith finally allowed himself to relax, basking in that good feeling. _Familiar_ , he repeated to himself, but the silence did not take long to come back. The boy right in front of him was the one who used to fill these uncomfortable silences, and now he was just staring at the white sheets and playing with his fingers clearly unsettled.

“I really miss you” he broke the silence suddenly, voice low. It sounded like a confession.

“I know,” Keith felt his own remorse oozing through those words, “I know you do, but I'm here now.”

“I wish you had stayed. I miss you so much,” he continued, as if Keith hadn't said anything.

“I'm not leaving you,” he uncrossed his arms so he could intertwine his fingers with Lance’s. Lance closed his eyes tightly and pursed his lips. “I'll stay as long as you want me to.”

“You shouldn't make promises that you won't keep.”

“I’m not leaving” he insisted, using his other hand to turn Lance's face in his direction, making the boy look directly at Keith when he opened his eyes.

“You already did,” he covered Keith's hand on his face with his own, pulling it away carefully and smiling. “But it’s ok, I'm not mad at you. I could never be mad at you for too long, anyway.”

“Lance, it's me. The real me. I'm here.”

“I wish things had been different, that maybe I could go back and do it all again. Stay with you this time, explore space, be a hero… I wonder how we would be now if I hadn't spent so much time trying to be mad at you and enjoyed the time we had together. And I really wish I could actually tell you all of that.”

“Lance, please…”

“It's okay, Keith” he cracked a smile, but it just felt hollow. He dropped Keith's hands on the edge of the bed. Close enough for Keith to be able to touch him again, but far enough for him to know that he shouldn't. “You don't have to lie to me, I can hear the nurses talking about my diagnosis. It doesn't bother me anymore, at least this way I can still have you around, even though I can't tell you all the things I've always wanted to say.”

Lance sighed and closed his eyes, leaning his head against the wall.

“Is space still as incredible as the first time we got there?”

“It's not the same without you,” he confessed, moving away from the edge of the bed. Moving away from him. Lance laughed. _Familiar_ , Keith’s mind repeated, _but twisted_.


End file.
